The Platinum Rule for great relationships
27 Wednesday Jul 2011
I have a method for creating great relationships?
I’m talking all types of relationships: those with friends, with co-workers, with family and especially with that special someone.
I call it The Platinum Rule.
I can tell you’re skeptical. And with a name like “The Platinum Rule”, you should be. But it works.
The Silver rule is good, but it falls short: “Do not do unto others what you would not have them do unto you.”
All that does it tell you how to not annoy those around you i.e. don’t poke them, slap them, kick them insult them, degrade them or make them consider calling the police on you.
The Platinum Rule goes further.
It’s also better than the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
The Platinum Rule says, whatever the setting, whoever you’re dealing with, treat people as THEY want to be treated.
Sounds ridiculously simple doesn’t it?
The problem is when we aim to treat people as we would like to be treated (The Golden Rule), we’re likely to be off target from providing them with the type of interaction they truly want.
You might like getting hugs from anybody, but that doesn’t mean you should run around hugging everybody.
Your expectations, wants, needs and tolerance levels are completely different from those of the people with whom you interact.
However, there are a few things you must keep in mind:
- You need to know yourself. Know what you’re capable of giving and what you’re capable of taking.
- Never give someone what they want at the expense of your values.
- Never give someone what they want to your detriment. That’s not being selfish, that’s called self-preservation.
Also, bear in mind, a relationship between a pair of people is a two-way street. Therefore, your actions are only half of the equation. But the Platinum Rule gets the most out of your half.
You can’t go around trying to please everyone, nor should you (you don’t want to be a people-pleaser). But the more you ask yourself “How does this person want to be treated” the more positive your interactions will be.
“You can have everything in life that you want, if you just give enough other people what they want.”
- Zig Ziglar